What Love Is

Posted by admin | Posted in Love | Posted on 26-11-2010-05-2008

0

Click here for "The Free , TV, Games, Radio Toolbar".

.

What Love Is

What Love Is


Free Online Articles Directory





Why Submit Articles?
Top Authors
Top Articles
FAQ
AB Answers

Publish Article

0 && $.browser.msie ) {
var ie_version = parseInt($.browser.version);
if(ie_version Hello Guest
Login


Login via


Register
Hello
My Home
Sign Out

Email

Password


Remember me?
Lost Password?

Home Page > Relationships > Marriage > What Love Is

What Love Is

Edit Article |

Posted: Feb 06, 2010 |Comments: 0

|

Share

Ask a question

Ask our experts your Marriage related questions here…200 Characters left

Related Questions

Its a very seru=ious love thing , again kids think im cevil cos of my kid too much klittle money hell) but the lies are insane , i keep lying i guess
I never want to get very intimate with my love but always i forget my oath and kiss her on those places where we dont want before marriage , now i am in great depression for what i did please sb help
How soon is now love spit love ?
Im a Taurus woman who is trying to win back the heart of an Pisces ex. We were first loves but i broke it of twice, how can i get him to trust me? I love him, he loves me but hes with someone else

Syndicate this Article

Copy to clipboard

What Love Is

By: Norman W Wilson

About the Author

I am an author and co-author of college texts in the humanities. I have three speculative fiction  novels published and numerous articles at various Ezines. I am the administrator/moderator for The Forum at 1stTurningPoint.com

(ArticlesBase SC #1827073)

Article Source: http://www.articlesbase.com/What Love Is





What Love Is…

Norman W Wilson, PhD.

The following is an modified excerpt from my novel, Apocalyptic Adam (2005). I feel it held true when I first wrote it and thought it was an appropriate time to share it once again.

I wish to discuss two words: Trust and Love. Both seem appropriate in light of the recent unfortunate events. Here are two questions for you to consider. Is Trust given or is it earned? And second, Is Love given or earned? And since I have two questions, I must confess to a third. What is the connection between Trust and Love?

Once we have answered the first question, we may then say it serves as the pinion for love, the basis, the rock upon which love is built. And there is no doubt, that’s what the world needs now.

So, what does it mean to Trust? To Love? The issue goes back to the beginning of time. In Christianity, the first Adam trusted Eve. He had no reason not to trust her. Sampson had no reason no to trust Delilah. Caesar, though warned to beware of the Ides of March, had no reason to mistrust Brutus. Each found their trust betrayed. What happens when trust is betrayed? Love files out the window.

To love, one must trust that the other is going to promote their well being and happiness. Violate trust and love is lost, perhaps never to return. If it does, it may not be on the same secure footing as before. How do you get it back? Earn it? Yes! You have to make regular installments just as you would in your bank account. And then maybe, when the account has been active for awhile, trust may return. If it does, it will be in the name of love. It is trust that engenders harmony and peace; it is trust that engenders that love that each human being seeks.

Dr. Robert Frey reminds us that we must do all we can do to create a love-based reality. In doing so, we must realize it is a ‘moment to moment affair.’ So, how does one love? First let’s see if we can arrive at a working definition. I love chocolate, the Mariners, mystery novels. I love my pet. Love, Love, Love. And not one ounce of understanding. The word, Love, has been so overused it has become nearly vacuous. So how do we take something that has nearly lost its meaning and give it back? This question is really no different than the question about trust.

Trust is given. Love is given.. Do you give trust with conditions? Only if it has been violated. Is it necessary to read the fine print to know if you are trusted? Isn’t that what prenuptial agreements or pre-assigned responsibilities within a relationship are—fine print conditions?

We are told by the musical muses that ‘love is a many-splendored thing.’ We are told ‘love is what makes the world go around,’ and we are told that ‘love is the greatest thing.’ Yet, do we all not put restrictions on its natural flow? Do we not have reservations because love is an unconditional commitment? After all, isn’t conditional love something that can be turned on and off? A conditioned love requires that one of the partners is to do something that pleases the other. On the simplest level, a child picks up its toy from the floor because its mother says “How sweet. I love you, honey.” The message conveyed by such behavior is that one must earn love. People who are perfectionists and those we are people pleasers most likely have experienced love conditionally and have never really felt love. They have not experienced that unconditional commitment. What a box!

Dare I ask commitment to what? To faith that love will be returned? In Christianity, one is reminded that “faith to move mountains” is worthless without love. We are told that even philanthropy without love is lacking in spirituality. In Love, we give to others. That is the essence of philanthropy; it is the essence of faith and it should be the basis for our interaction with each other. When one loves, there has been a choice—an expressed desire made for the happiness of someone else. That we call benevolence. The commitment then, is to a personal behavior that reflects benevolence.

Do not confuse benevolence with altruism. Altruism dictates that you sacrifice yourself for the benefit of others; that is, their needs claim your actions and behavior and even your life. If I may borrow a term from today’s computer jargon, benevolence enables; it enables you to achieve your value from relationships with other people. Benevolence does not rest upon the misfortunes of others; whereas, altruism seems to be directed by that fact. The simple act of giving someone the benefit of the doubt creates an avenue for benevolent behavior, the opportunity to demonstrate the value of unconditional love. When that love is a commitment to a personal behavior that derives value from life itself, from interaction with others, and with society as a whole, then you are benevolent. Matthew Fox has said, “Compassion is not a moral commandment but a flow and overflow of the fullest human and divine energies.” That’s benevolence.

If a man wants to build a house, he uses wood. He must also provide hollow space within that house; empty of wood thus both wood and the absence of wood are required to build that house. Building a loving relationship is similar. The builder of Love must bring values (the wood) and time (the space) to the relationship. To do otherwise results in a house built of sand. You cannot be as the shifting stand if you want a loving, personal, and lasting relationship. If you are, there is no permanence. It will have slipped between your fingers before you had a chance to grasp it, to taste it, to savor its delicacy.

The late syndicated columnist Jim Bishop wrote an inspiring essay called Love Something Apart. In it, he states, ‘Love is giving. It is the unification of two persons into one. It is possession and being possessed. But it is also jealousy, hostility, insecurity, and despair. It is the only thing which must be resurrected every day.’ Trust is applied here because one trusts that there will be a resurrection. Love allows us to experience life and to connect in a positive way. Denying the existence and the experience of love, choosing not to practice it, denies your divinity. And that is the sin! Denying your spirituality; a damnation of all that is divine.

Buddhist tell us to pay careful attention to the other person, to list for what is actually being said so that we can recognize the source of what is being felt. If you do that, you can respond with care, and compassion. And isn’t that benevolence? And isn’t that Love? Of course it is. But at the same time, it is so much more. It is the total and complete recognition of the divine in all life. Swami Vivekananda has written, ‘real existence, real knowledge, and real love are eternally connected with one another, the three in one; where one of them is, the others must be.’

We make the mistake in loving the wrong way. A man, for example, loves his wife. He wants her with him at all times, to sit by him at social functions, to eat with him, to walk with him. He calls her several times a day from his place of work. This makes him a slave to her existence. This is not love. Love would set her free to be all that she could be. And if she, in turn loves him, she would help him cut the umbilical cord has fastened to her. It is, after all a mutual thing. Every act of love should bring happiness and joy if not a sense of wonderment. In real love, love does not deliberately cause pain or suffering. If it does, there has been a corruption.

In closing I wish to leave with you a little piece a friend shared with me. It’s author is unknown. It’s titled The Essence of Compassion. “Resolve to be tender with the young, compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the starving, and tolerant with the weak and wrong—because sometime in your life you will have been all of these.”

Retrieved from “http://www.articlesbase.com/marriage-articles/what-love-is-1827073.html

(ArticlesBase SC #1827073)

Norman W Wilson -
About the Author:

I am an author and co-author of college texts in the humanities. I have three speculative fiction  novels published and numerous articles at various Ezines. I am the administrator/moderator for The Forum at 1stTurningPoint.com

Rate this Article

1
2
3
4
5

vote(s)
2 vote(s)

Feedback
RSS
Print
Email
Re-Publish

Source:  http://www.articlesbase.com/marriage-articles/what-love-is-1827073.html

Article Tags:
love, trust, benevolence, alturism, commitment

Latest Marriage Articles
More from Norman W Wilson

Mail Order Brides – if thirty and still looking for the soul mate

The concept of Mail Order Brides comes from the time when early settlers of American continent, principally men were unable to seek out brides for themselves in their own country.

By:
Tomasl

Relationships>
Marriagel
Nov 25, 2010

Effectively Save the Marriage Crisis

Over the years, divorce seems to have been the commonplace for people. Even through, I think no one want to divorce happened to himself. Every woman gets married for love. If your marriage struck crisis, what measures would you take to save your marriage? Do you prefer the cold war, argument, leaving home, playing extra-marital affairs or divorce? If you want to be happy, all of the above will be rejected, it’s better to save it with your heart and wisdom

By:
Cathy Chenl

Relationships>
Marriagel
Nov 25, 2010

Become More Attractive after Marriage

Women get married at twenties, still Drunk with the joy of sweet love. But with the mundane and sentimental daily life, half of man’s enthusiasm seems to be reduced. Once he pressed hard upon her, and gradually become less away from the polymer. Badly,after several years, he even actually began on the extra-marital interest in young girls. With this situation, in order to attract your beloved and have the happy life and family, how can women be more attractive after marriage?

By:
Cathy Chenl

Relationships>
Marriagel
Nov 25, 2010

Matrimonial Foresight for Two Hearts to Be Come One

Matrimonial foresight encompasses through the medium of website promotes the innate qualities that create high probabilities of success rates in wholesome and lively marriages for endurance, happiness and a form of togetherness either seen before.

By:
Anmol Jodil

Relationships>
Marriagel
Nov 25, 2010

Keys to a Happy Marriage

Almost every marriage starts out with much sweetness and happiness and best wishes. Each couple is of hopes and dreams for their future life together. But a happy marriage life is not so easy to maintain for long time.

By:
Alel

Relationships>
Marriagel
Nov 25, 2010

Stop Your Divorce After Cheating – One Method That Works Like A Charm

Do you want to live the charmed life with your wife and stop your divorce after cheating? Most men in your situation do. As much as you may have fantasized about some sort of happily ever after with the other woman you probably realized all along that your wife is the best reality you could have possibly chosen.

By:
TW Jacksonl

Relationships>
Marriagel
Nov 25, 2010

Stop My Divorce After Cheating – Is It Even Possible?

The thing that you must do if you are sincere about your wishes to stop your divorce after cheating is overcome that sense of betrayal and replace it with newfound feelings of happiness, comfort, contentment, love, respect, and admiration. These things may not seem like much by themselves but when you combine them in the right proportions they can be the driving force behind real miracles that will ultimately save your marriage from divorce – even after cheating.

By:
TW Jacksonl

Relationships>
Marriagel
Nov 25, 2010

new trend of nupitals

marriage’s new trend…. the new trend of marriage is just a onus on parents…

By:
charul

Relationships>
Marriagel
Nov 25, 2010

The Apollonian and Dionysian

There are two forces that compete for dominance in the human creative personality. One wants control; the other abandon. Nietzsche, Jung, and May are referenced as authorities that comment upon the Apollonian Dionysian conflict.

By:
Norman W Wilsonl

News and Society>
Philosophyl
Nov 24, 2010

Shaman, Sage, Raconteur

Dr. Wilson provides a description of the roles played by a shaman, sage, and a raconteur. He points out that each is a highly respected individual in the native community.

By:
Norman W Wilsonl

News and Society>
Culturel
Sep 10, 2010

Perspective and Perception: It all Depends upon Your Point of View

Dr. Wilson presents an overview of changing one’s perspective to gain a new perception, that is, understanding.

By:
Norman W Wilsonl

Self Improvement>
Psychologyl
Aug 29, 2010

Shaman, Spirit, Soul

Discusses the relationship between spirit and soul as viewed by shaman. Suggests the shamanic concept of spirit is not dissimilar to the Ancient Egyptian BA.

By:
Norman W Wilsonl

Spirituality>
Mysticisml
Aug 23, 2010

Student Testing VS Student Evaluation

Provides a look at past testing and predictions fifty years ago and what is currently the testing situation in American school. Dr. Wilson makes a plea for student evaluation as opposed to standardized testing.

By:
Norman W Wilsonl
Educationl
Aug 14, 2010

Student Testing VS Student Evaluation

Millions are spent on standardized testing rather than on student evaluation. Such testing proves nothing in terms of real learning on the part of students. It creates difficult relationships between student, teachers, and community.

By:
Norman W Wilsonl

Education>
K-12 Educationl
Aug 06, 2010

The Scintillating Number Seven

Presents an overview of the role the number seven has in past and current society.

By:
Norman W Wilsonl

News and Society>
Culturel
Jul 01, 2010

A National Disgrace: The Education System and the Dumbing of America

Questions regarding the wisdom of charter schools, homeschooling, unschooling are raised by the author, an educator with 40 years of experience. A challenge is offered to the taxpayer.

By:
Norman W Wilsonl

Education>
K-12 Educationl
Jun 17, 2010

Add new Comment

Your Name: *

Your Email:

Comment Body: *

 

Verification code:*

* Required fields

Submit

Your Articles Here
It’s Free and easy

Sign Up Today

Author Navigation

My Home
Publish Article
View/Edit Articles
View/Edit Q&A
Edit your Account
Manage Authors
Statistics Page
Personal RSS Builder

My Home
Edit your Account
Update Profile
View/Edit Q&A
Publish Article
Author Box


Norman W Wilson has 28 articles online

Contact Author

Subscribe to RSS

Print article

Send to friend

Re-Publish article

Articles Categories
All Categories

Advertising
Arts & Entertainment
Automotive
Beauty
Business
Careers
Computers
Education
Finance
Food and Beverage
Health
Hobbies
Home and Family
Home Improvement
Internet
Law
Marketing
News and Society
Relationships
Self Improvement
Shopping
Spirituality
Sports and Fitness
Technology
Travel
Writing

Relationships

Breakup
Dating
Divorce
Friendship
Infidelity
Marriage
Sexuality
Weddings

Need Help?
Contact Us
FAQ
Submit Articles
Editorial Guidelines
Blog

Site Links
Recent Articles
Top Authors
Top Articles
Find Articles
Site Map

Webmasters
RSS Builder
RSS
Link to Us

Business Info
Advertising

Use of this web site constitutes acceptance of the Terms Of Use and Privacy Policy | User published content is licensed under a Creative Commons License.
Copyright © 2005-2010 Free Articles by ArticlesBase.com, All rights reserved.

I am an author and co-author of college texts in the humanities. I have three speculative fiction  novels published and numerous articles at various Ezines. I am the administrator/moderator for The Forum at 1stTurningPoint.com

Click here for "The Free , TV, Games, Radio Toolbar".

VN:F [1.9.21_1169]
Rating: 0.0/10 (0 votes cast)
VN:F [1.9.21_1169]
Rating: 0 (from 0 votes)

Write a comment

*

base64_decode

Powered by Yahoo! Answers

Switch to our mobile site

Get Adobe Flash player